Erratic Scribbles

Determination.

He was a fundamentally broken person. Nothing seemed to faze him. Not the darkness the world had or the passing beauty it seemed to posses.

He seemed like a tree, still and flowing with the wind. But yet, unlike a tree, he seemed to not embrace what was around him. He didn’t even reject it. He just stood still, right there, within all the chaos that surrounded him, unfazed and undeterred, continuing his existence like a symbol of an empty canvas.

As his shell stood there, his soul un-captivated, drifted asunder around him with the wind. With songs, wild emotions, darkness and light, it mixed in the air around him, creating an aura of awe that never really quite fell on the perspective of those around him. A silent scream lit up the world that he lived in, the void around him engulf with black fire, killing everything his vision laid eyes upon. Yet, in the real world, no one noticed him.

He stopped leaning towards the wall and lifted himself up. “Proper posture” he said as he put the cigarette within his lips, a habit more than an addiction. Unconcerned with the consequences of what lay ahead, he moved on, a mountain dragging behind him. Amidst the crowd he walked, with flames rife around him, burning, eating whatever the world had to offer. Chains clanked as he put on his headphones, oblivious to him, he dragged his feet with the mountain that followed him. “Dig down”, he repeated to himself, as the music started and the lyrics were spoken.

 

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His goal, seemed alien. Not the will to survive, not greed, not ambition, not greatness. He sought change. The void in his eyes seemed to give him life, the same life it seemed to take away. The eerie semblance to the darkness he had inside of him gave way to a vision of the future. Not that of prediction, but that of the ability to change what he saw.

And so he dragged on forward, amidst the crowd, willingly within the chaos of the world, unmoved, unfaltered, and uninterested.

Erratic Scribbles

The Daily Social Intercourse

Don’t we all wish to be the dark mysterious stranger and to perhaps one day, be awed at rather than the one doing the act. It is, perhaps these selfish desires, simple things in life, of wanting to be wearing another’s shoes, that help us mistake a human for a mythical being.

There’s little effort for some people when it comes to communication, but for others it can be a nightmare. The life of a mysterious stranger might as well be hell for the simple reason that he doesn’t know how to talk, to conduct basic communication, which is perhaps why he’s so mysterious.

The daily work a person puts into connecting with another person verbally or otherwise, is generally unaccounted for. For some, it can be hard to even comprehend, while for others, it comes as naturally as leaves to a tree. But poets who can’t rhyme, deserve no qualms in this world. And that is perhaps where, the ones who do know the truth of the world, go wrong.

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Source: pinterest.com/pin/288230444875929894

People, more than anything else, are what shape us to be who we are. And later, to become who we have to be. Depending on the situation, a person’s tone is enough to send a shiver down someone’s spine. Depending on where your thoughts wander, that is either good or bad, from your perspective. Words shape us to be who we are, some take it unto themselves to be a reflection of who they are on someone else’s mirror; while others reel in their desires to be invisible in the world. The few that run after balance, lose their path and fall in the chasm of disappointment, for there is no middle. Only mistakes and more mistakes.

And yet, even with it’s significant importance in our lives, so little is said about the daily social intercourse we have with each other through words, poetry, literature, music and other things of wonder.

It is perhaps, because of it’s negligence, that we go on to admire people who live life unfiltered, arrogant and overconfident. Growing up, the simple act of talking was painful to bear for the mysterious stranger. Not because he didn’t want to but because of the thought that no one understood him haunted his ever living self. From his perspective, the daily social intercourse between people, was no less than mesmerizing. From his observation, life was but beautifully weaving lives together in ways that he couldn’t comprehend. By his observation, he was but a pawn in the game of life. By others’ observations, he was but the main figure; idolized and transcended, and misunderstood.

Erratic Scribbles

A rambling of storms. 

The rain drops kept coming and going and yet the storm never stopped. It was strange to see a storm of dust soon get replaced with one of water and then of cool breeze. A blink of an eye is all you needed to miss the transitions that came in waves. Life seemed to be a similar metaphor, a relentless storm ever changing its shape. Uncaring and unfair.

Some days seem all too familiar. A gentle touch of the cold breeze is all you need to reminiscent. The days when long walks didn’t seem as dreadful or when life still seemed like a child’s sandbox, with its intricate ability to create dreams and foster them.

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Source: pinterest.com/pin/556476097688645951/

It’s been a while since those days. But it still feels as if life started this morning when I woke up. As the clock tick tocks, life moves ahead slowly despite our unwillingness. The different faces crowd the streets in the morning only for them to fade away at night. From our perspective, it’s unnatural. And yet, we play along. Like a theater drama where everyone knows that they’re in it and yet, blissfully unaware infront of the audience, the people they care about. –  In theater,  blissful ignorance is a skill; in life however, the same can be called out to be a terrible flaw.

What’s the point of all this I wonder, if there even is one to begin with. Maybe if life was as clear about itself as it is with everything it presents us with, maybe it wouldn’t be as novel to be alive. Maybe the curiosity of the answer along with the inability to achieve it is what keeps us going. Maybe it’s a different reason each time. Maybe it doesn’t matter. Maybe sometimes life, just like the rain storm with little water, is just meant to be enjoyed at leisure.

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Source: pinterest.com/pin/160440805445732769

Even if expectations never seem to get met, maybe it’s good to appreciate the breeze than it not being there in the first place. If storms should teach us anything in life, it’s that maybe in life, not everything is meant to be controlled. And every opportunity can be that of good or bad depending on what we decide to do with it, and how we see it.

Erratic Scribbles

Survival

Changing. Adapting. Unlearning old things.

In a world where survival of the fittest is a very real thing, ‘fittest’ for the average human being in the modern day world, only till a certain extent, meant the shell that embraced his being.

Survival for us, it seems, was based a lot more on the ability to adapt to situations, change when the need requires you to and erasing certain parts of your past, in order to move ahead. It’s like cleaning wounds, it’ll always hurt but sometimes, the pain we feel now is necessary so that we won’t grow up broken with a disease that just grows with us and breaks us even further.

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Credit for above art: Pinterest.com

But sometimes, analogies don’t do some situations any justice. Sometimes, it’s up-to us to see certain things for the individual uniqueness they might be. Sometimes, the change we have to endure is more than just a simple painful process, maybe even a psychological one. Sometimes, the ability to adapt, means that you’ve to sacrifice a lot more than you gain, because situations demand so. Sometimes, unlearning things mean forgetting the past that you held so dearly till only a few months ago, and in a way, letting go of who you were till then.

We’ve all grown up with mistakes and learnt our best lessons from failure, yet we make an environment where failure is the last straw. What are so we afraid of today really, if not of the failure to be what we are?

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Credit for above art + featured cover art: Picolo-kun

We live in a world of paradoxes. Like pandora’s box, we search for a truth where there exists none. We stare at reality with our perspective lenses, willing to believe that there’s a validation in the world which will tell us what the right thing to do is. We have grown up in a world where we’re afraid to make our own road if there exists none, and in a way, have lost ourselves in someone else’s path and in someone else’s search for the truth they believe in.

But why is it that we’re never given a chance to stay. Stop. And just stare.